I'm not 60

I realize I have neglected my duties as a blogger, and as a result, I apologize to all 3 of my readers (Dad, Neep, & Shawn). You know me - I have to have 457 things going on at once as to give about .15% of my effort to each activity.

Anyhow, I have an entire list of topics to discuss, but I use this blog to vent (if you haven't already noticed), and therefore, need to vent about an incident that occurred about 7 minutes ago.

There is a young lady in my office, whom I refer to as "KinderCare2". She's 22? I think. Anyway, bless her heart, she's a Florida Hick, and she sadly thinks that she and I have much in common because I'm from Texas, and she is country.

Clearly...this is not the case.

Anyway, she's perfectly nice, but a few minutes ago, she was behind me while I was at the water cooler. She said in her twangy voice, "Melissa, I can only hope that one of my legs is half the size of yours when I'm your age!"

I stopped fresh in my tracks to the point where my cup runneth over. (that was for you, babe)

WT Fat?

Let's break this down...

First of all, what she said could have been taken in the context that my legs are big, and that she hopes her legs get bigger to where they are "half the size" of my big legs. Fortunately, for her sake, this is not what she meant.

Secondly, "when I'm your age"?!?!? I mean...I'm 33! I'm not 60!!! Not that being 60 isn't fantastic (Jenn), but, really??? Who says that?!?!?

Sigh...do I have to teach these people EVERYTHING?

On another note, this past weekend we had the pleasure of visiting San Antonio (Texas, not Florida, I always have to say that b/c people in Florida never actually think you leave this state, and there does exist a San Antonio, FL) . I was so happy to be back and to take Shawn, because it was his first time to visit. We had a marvelous time, and I got to revisit some places that took me back to childhood.

A funny story:

I kept telling Shawn how excited I was to visit my grandparents on Saturday, and that I couldn't wait to stop and get homemade breakfast tacos along the way. Old Boston Boy kept thinking that I meant tacos, as in, Taco Bell crunchy shell with beef tacos, because I kept saying "tacos". San Antonio has a few areas that may not be entirely pleasing to the eye, so to speak, and so on the way to my grandparents house, we entered the barrio, and I told Shawn (who was driving) he could stop at a number of establishments along the way for $.99 cent tacos. He said, "Babe - I don't want tacos!" Thinking, that I meant regular tacos, and I'm like, "Why not?! It's breakfast!" Long story short, we finally clarified that I meant breakfast tacos and not tacos regular. A breakfast taco, by my definition to him, is a delicious homemade flour tortilla filled with any number of items including eggs, potato, bacon, chorizo, and barbacoa. He finally said "ooooohhhhhhhhh - okayyyyy - I get it now."

Gringos...

Anyway, continuing along the road, we were sort of in an unfamiliar area, and Ern called about the time we were arguing about tacos. Ern was (of course out of worry) somewhat flustered that I had not followed his directions, nor did I entirely know where I was located at the time. He told me to "head south" to get to my grandparents house, to which I responded "I don't know what that is." He said, "Don't you have a compass in your car?!"

Seriously? Who has a COMPASS???

I'm thinking, "Dad - I have an iPhone! An iPhone with a GPS that will get me directions to anywhere at any time. " Sigh...

As we continued down the road, I told Shawn to stop at another place. He took one look and said, "With bars on the windows?" I'm like, "Honey, we ain't gonna find a place around here without 'em, and besides, it's just an extra precaution, we are perfectly safe."

So, finally, after passing several establishments, we stopped at a place. Shawn reluctantly went in, and asked me what he should order. I told him he would enjoy the egg & cheese, and any other egg option on the menu, so he ordered three tacos (breakfast). $7.00 and 5 tacos later, we were satisfied and happy. I think I gave Shawn a new reason to love Texas.

The wedding was absolutely fabulous. A truly gorgeous celebration of two beautiful people. We could not be more thrilled for the wonderful couple. I do have at least 3 hilarious stories to tell, but I'm afraid my parents will be mad, so I may have to direct you to my "secret blog" where I can say anything and everything and not be in trouble (even though I'm 33, married, and live out of state).